it’s just after 8:30pm and i can’t sleep and i work at 1:30am tomorrow. it’s not insomnia, not really.
it’s been almost two months since i applied for that job i want, and about one month since that initial interview. there is chatter of something happening near columbus circle next year, so if the puerto rico thing doesn’t happen, i will stay in new york for the foreseeable future.
typing into my phone seems so outdated.
am drinking a beer and wondering how long 1600 words will take me to write. probably not long, but i want them to make sense.
god, you know that girl from spring? rikki? tell her i said hi.
i should move.
am so sick of my family being so defeated. there is a point in life when perseverance turns in obstinance and no one wins. wish the family knew that. my father sounded awful last time I saw him. he said he’s realized recently how all the dreams he’s had in life will die with him. that is do sad to hear, but the realist nature of the realization makes sense, dreams are for people who sleep.
next day off, i’m fucking.
another thing that i think i love about new york is how often i might be corralled into doing something awful but there’re a ton of reasons to do something better. this last sentence made more sense in my head.
i am too lazy to look for the exact dates but the new alejandro gonzalez inarritu and new david fincher films are out…
…which brings me to, a few days ago, a friend did *not* want to go to the bar with me so he said we should go see a movie and i went because it was rush hour and i was already in the upper west side (i know how awful this sounds, yes), and we saw that dreadful This Is Where I Leave You, and afterward, i was waiting for him to ask me what i thought of it only he didn’t. at one point i forced into conversation a “you haven’t said anything about that movie; guess it means you didn’t like it. i hated it.” what an asshole i am.
but it was so shitty, so don’t see it.
it’s been twenty minutes since i started this post.